"Thou Art Still Chosen:" A Letter To Those Who Have Given Up

Tonight I am writing to a special group of people, people who will always hold a place dear to my heart. I am speaking to those who are on the edge of giving up. I am speaking to those who feel they no longer can return from the path they have chosen to take. I am speaking to those whose hearts have been broken and whose spirits weigh heavy with the regret of past or current decisions. I choose to speak to you, my beloved brothers and sisters, because not so long ago at all I was in your shoes. Approximately eighteen months ago I was teetering on the edge of falling headlong into an abyss I had created for myself. This great chasm was filled with self-disgust, doubt, and despair. I had dug it over time during a “spiritual drought,” a time in which I lost sight of my divine potential, and made choices which left my heart shattered and my soul deprived and starving for light and love. I truly wanted to change, I had tried countless times to turn away from my habits, and I had failed each time. I felt like I had nowhere else to go with my life, that the person I had become was who I would be stuck as for the rest of my existence. I could not even stand to look at myself in the mirror. Truly, I had reached a point in which I had given up on myself, and I felt as if I had trapped myself in a self-imposed prison, which I had built out of bricks of sin. It was the darkest time of my entire life. I cannot recall a single instance so terrifically horrifying as what I felt everyday of my life during that time. I could hardly bear waking up in the morning, for I knew that day I would shame myself more, and I was terrified to go to sleep at night, aware that my dreams were often brutally honest recollections and reminders of the path I had chosen for myself. I had hit rock bottom. Hard. And yet, today the girl who writes this is a completely different woman. Who was once hopeless, is now full of hope. Who was once dwelling in utter darkness, is now filled with a most glorious light. Who was once unable to love her broken self, is now amazed and healed by the love of her Heavenly Father and brother, Jesus Christ. Eighteen months ago, I could barely imagine going to church meetings and not feeling guilty and miserable. Today, I went back to the temple after receiving my personal endowment last week, and I will be leaving in less than three weeks to serve a mission among the beloved people of the Nebraska Omaha mission. My friends, if you need evidence that no one is worth giving up on, look at me. I am living proof of the transforming power of the Atonement of our Savior.

And that is why I speak to you today; because I have been where you are and I have been rescued by the Lord. The sweetness of what I feel now is beyond all description, and I know without a doubt that you also can feel this way. You too can be saved. You too can be overwhelmed with the love and confidence your Heavenly Father has in you. Yes, He has confidence in you, just as I do. He has confidence that you will turn from your path. He has confidence that you will come to Him. And, perhaps most importantly, He has confidence that you will work great miracles for good in the future. I know this is truth. I feel it more deeply than I have words to explain. Just because you have been lost does not mean you cannot be found. It never has and it never will.  It is never too late to be found by the Good Shepherd. You can never wander too far, or stray into landscapes too dark and dangerous for His loving eyes to see you, and for His loving arms to scoop you up and carry you back to safety. No effort is too much to the Lord when it comes to saving His precious ones. You are precious. Let me repeat that. You. Are. Absolutely. Precious. No matter how many agonizing mountains He has to climb, no matter how many deep and pitch black valleys He must navigate through, no matter how many bone-freezing rivers and scorching deserts he must overcome, He will do it. Because you are worth it. You are precious. And not only will He suffer all these things, He does it with a smile on His face and love in His heart. Never does our brother and Savior begrudgingly reach out His hand to pull one of us up from the depths, thinking to Himself how pathetically we got ourselves into that mess. Not once has He, nor will He ever, complain that we once again need His help. I promise you that. His love and patience, like His Atonement, are infinite. We did not come to this Earth to be perfect. We came to this Earth to be proved. He knows that we will stumble and fall. That’s just part of the deal. But the wonderful thing about Christ is that when we stumble and fall, He is right there, just waiting to pick us up, dust us off, and help us choose a path, which next time may not be so perilous. Can you hear what I am saying? We could fall one million times a day, and He would be there waiting for the one million and first time, because He sees us perfectly, and He knows that eventually, when He picks us up and sets us aright, that one day we will learn to dodge those obstacles, to pick paths that are not quite so dangerous, and we will learn to lean on Him as our guide and friend.  He will NEVER give up on you. Never. He has not doubted you, He does not now doubt you, and never will he ever doubt you in the future. The Savior of the world, the most powerful and wonderful being in the universe and eternities, has faith in you. He believes in you. Isn’t that incredible? If He has not given up on us, why should we ever give up on ourselves? We have the greatest individual who ever existed on our side, helping us every step of the way. You have not yet lost His grace or your divine potential. I love Doctrine and Covenants section three for this reason. In this section, we read the revelation given to Joseph Smith Junior, after he had allowed Martin Harris to borrow the manuscript, against the warnings of the Lord, resulting in 116 precious pages of scripture to be lost. What a tragic consequence! This was undoubtedly an excruciatingly painful time for the Prophet, as he recognized the effects of his decision, a time in which he must have questioned whether or not he was still qualified to do the will of the Lord, and perhaps he even doubted whether or not the Lord even wanted him to be a part of the work anymore. And yet, in verse ten, we read these incredible words from the Lord: “But remember, God is merciful; therefore, repent of that which thou hast done which is contrary to the commandment which I gave you, and thou art still chosen, and art again called to the work” (D&C 3:10.) I love the way that is worded. Thou art still chosen, and art again called to the work. Absolutely breathtaking.  Brothers and sisters, my dear friends, I testify to you that you still have an integral place in our Heavenly Father’s infinite plan. No matter what you have done, you still are chosen, and called to the work. Don’t you dare give up. The Lord hasn’t given up on you and you should not either. You are worth more than that. Cry unto Him and He will come unto you in your time of need and He will save you. Please, don’t you give up on yourself. You have miracles to work. You have mountains to move and seas to part. You have lives to bless and eternities to shape. You need not have lived a perfect life to be a part of this perfect gospel. If that was the case, our church buildings would be completely empty each Sunday. I am begging you, pleading with you, don’t you ever give up on yourself. Your experiences and wanderings may give you the insight and sensitivity to touch hearts in ways that perhaps no one else can. Perhaps you can find the lonely wanderers because you yourself have walked those same dark paths. You are needed and you are infinitely important. You have a divine potential to reach, and the Lord will help you reach it, if you only ask Him. Don’t you ever, ever, ever give up on yourself. You are precious. You are beloved. You are magnificent. Forgive yourself, and move on. Choose today a better path. It’s hard, I know. I absolutely know how difficult it is to turn away from habits engrained deeply within you. But it is so worth it. Yes, you may stumble and regress once, twice, one million times, but don’t you dare give up. You keep trying, you keep praying, and you keep asking the Lord to help you and I promise you that one day you will look back, just as I did today, and you will be overwhelmed by the complete change the Lord has made in your life…and you will be overwhelmed by what He has enabled you to accomplish, and you will be excited for the miracles He will have you work in the days to come. I promise that with my entire heart. The fourth chapter of Second Nephi is one of my absolute favorites, it is Nephi’s Psalm, and it is beautiful. Please, read it if you have a chance. I wish I could include all of the verses here, but I will highlight a small excerpt which brought me the courage to move on.

“O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in His condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?

 And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?

Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.” (2 Nephi 4: 26-28)

My courageous friends, don’t you give up on yourself. No matter what may weigh heavily on your soul, I beg of you to keep the faith in yourself. Your Savior and Heavenly Father have. You still can be a great and powerful force for good in this world. You can bring light to others in the dark. You can feel perfect love envelop you completely. Don’t you dare give up. Thou art still chosen.